I've read many books on relationships. This on is my favorite.

Much of this book focuses on learning your own fears, or "triggers" (as some would call them), and understanding how those effect you. Everyone's heard about how life is less about circumstances and more about how you react to them. This book focuses heavily on that topic, and does more than just re-hash it. It really focuses on getting to the root of what it is that effects you, and how. They are different for everyone. It then discusses strategies for reducing the effect difficulties have on you, once you know what to be ready for.

The next step is learning these triggers in those around you. Once you understand these, you can better assess how these effect your relationship with others and can helping break the destructive cycles that are all-too common.

Definitely worth the read. And if you don't have time to read all of it, read at least chapter 2 and 3.